Marriage and Family

Young families embody the hope and dreams of our future.  Few scenes move me as much as a young couple strolling along the seawall pushing a stroller; fathers splashing in the surf with their children while young mothers lounge on the beach; children laughing in the park flying kites with their fathers, giggling on playgrounds with their mothers.

 It is this special bond that God’s seventh commandment seeks to nourish and protect: “You shall not commit adultery.”   Sex, in all of its beauty and pleasure, was given to men and women to celebrate the mystery by which human life is conceived, cradled and nurtured.

 This year my wife and I celebrate our 55^th anniversary along with many of our friends who “pledged their troth” about the same time as we in 1968. We continue to celebrate life with our 3 children, their spouses and our 6 grandchildren ranging in age from 6 to 23. Marriage is worth holding on to, worth working through the difficulties, worth the investment.  The seventh commandment provides the foundation for trust and a love that lasts. It is the foundation of the family where children are born and nurtured.

 Some have rejected the Biblical view of marriage.  Somewhere along the way sex became recreational.  I guess this happened around the time birth control was introduced.  It revolutionized sex when my generation came of age in the 1960s: free sex with whomever without the consequences of conception.

 Melissa Batchelor Warnke, writing in the L.A. Times expressed current sexual values, “I believe that everyone should have exactly as much sex as they do or don't want to have, with whomever they do or don't want to have it, in whatever fashion they do or don't want to have it. So long as consent is present in any resultant exchange, one need not justify their choices.”  

 We have witnessed the consequences of the cavalier attitudes spawned over the last half-century. Wealthy and powerful men who once dominated the news have passed from the scene. Harvey Weinstein is in prison. Jeffrey Epstein hung himself.  Matt Lauer, Bill Cosby and other household names that once commanded respect are gone, leaving behind a trail of disgrace and embarrassment.

 As with other commandments, Jesus raised the bar.  “You have heard that it has been said, ‘You shall not commit adultery,’ but I say to you, he who looks on a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.” (Matthew 5:27).

 I like what Jeff Christopherson wrote in his book, Kingdom First, “The husband who faithfully and sacrificially loves his wife over a lifetime not only receives the personal blessing of a joyous marriage, but further, the Kingdom ripples of that union emanate through generations.  … Children, grandchildren, colleagues, friends, and neighbors are all secondary recipients of the grace experienced in a godly marriage.”

 I love watching young couples who are starting their journeys. Our neighborhood will welcome two newborns this summer to two young couples we have come to love. The strollers and minivans will soon follow, along with children’s laughter. The miracle of life and joys of marriage carry us forward into the next generation!

Lessons From the Coronation

 England crowned a king and the world watched.  Perhaps not as much as they did 70 years ago when Elizabeth ascended to the throne.  After all, Charles is not his mother and Camilla is not Diana.  The faults and foibles of the royal family are open knowledge, especially after Harry’s recent tell-all book, Spare. 

 It has always been so.  Royal families of the past provided Shakespeare with abundant material to compose his plays: Henry VI; Richard III; King John; Henry IV;  Henry V; Hamlet; and King Lear among his other classics.

 The Bible does not gloss over the failings of kings, beginning with Israel’s first king, Saul.  A handsome youth standing head and shoulders above his contemporaries, Saul was dragged from his hiding place among the baggage to be anointed Israel’s first king.  His insecurities soon rose to the surface, including his manic-depressive paranoia regarding David’s popularity.  Even David, considered to be the greatest of kings to occupy Israel’s throne, has his failures exposed, including adultery and murder. (2 Samuel 11).

 We all share in this human condition.  As the Bible says,  “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked.  Who can know it?”(Jeremiah 17:9). “There is none righteous, no not one.... All have sinned and come short of the glory of God,” (Roman 3:10,16).  The spotlight and the temptations make it more apparent among the powerful who sit on thrones.

 The corrupt human condition that Shakespeare portrayed in his brilliant plays always leads to the decline and demise of nations. One Kingdom alone supersedes them all. 

 Jesus stands alone and reigns supreme over all kings for all eternity.  His presence and His reign were referenced in the coronation of Charles III. In his coronation speech, the Archbishop of Canterbury  stated, “The King of kings, Jesus Christ, was anointed not to be served but to serve.” Following the public oath, the archbishop privately anointed Charles with oil drawn from trees on the Mount of Olives.  Before kneeling to receive the crown, Charles first knelt to receive communion, bread and wine symbolizing the body and blood of Jesus shed for the remission of sins.

 The Bible describes a much greater coronation in Heaven. “Out from the throne came flashes of lightning and sounds and peals of thunder. And there were seven lamps of fire burning before the throne, which are the seven spirits of God;  ... and day and night they do not cease to say, “Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God, the Almighty, who was and who is and who is to come,” (Revelation 4:5-8).   

 Isaiah predicted, “For a Child will be born to us, a Son will be given to us; and the government will ^[a]rest on His shoulders; and His name will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Eternal Father, Prince of Peace.  There will be no end to the increase of His government or of peace on the throne of David and over ^]his kingdom to establish it and to uphold it with justice and righteousness from then on and forevermore, (Isaiah 9:6-8).

Remembering

Every year we mark important dates on the calendar to remember historic events. Next week, May 8, is one of them.  For centuries it was celebrated as the date Joan of Arc led the French armies to defeat the English at Orleans in 1428.  This 17-year-old girl, who could neither read nor write, responded to “voices” that called her from her obscure village at Domremy to lead troops into battle and crown the dauphin, Charles the VII as King of France. It is one of the most astounding and best documented events in history. Her efforts led to the end of the 100 Years War and the preservation of France.  Without her extraordinary victories, England would have controlled France and there might have been no ally to aid the American colonists 350 years later.

 In 1945 Joan’s exploits on May 8 were eclipsed by Germany’s unconditional surrender to end World War II, celebrated as V-E Day in the United States. It is difficult to imagine the celebration that erupted in the Allied nations. The videos and photos from that day capture a moment of global elation. Very few who fought in that war survive.  The youngest are now in their late nineties. This year marks the 78^th anniversary of V-E Day.  The memories have faded with the vanishing generation.

 We have many holidays and traditions that help us remember significant moments in history, most of them events that occurred within the last few generations. One event in history refuses to fade.  One event has never been eclipsed by the rise and fall of nations.  That event is the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus of Nazareth.

 Over two thousand years after it occurred, that event is remembered and celebrated around the world. Every time followers of Jesus Christ gather to observe the broken bread and the shared cup, they remember that moment in history when God gave His only son for the forgive our sins and the promise of eternal life.

 Churches refer to this observance in various ways: as the Eucharist, Communion, or, simply, The Lord’s Supper.  It began in an upper room in Jerusalem on a Thursday evening, when Jesus sat down with his 12 closest followers for the Passover meal. Hours before he would be taken to the cross and crucified, Jesus took the unleavened Passover bread, broke it and gave it to his disciples saying, “This is my body which is broken for you.”  Then he took the wine and passed it among them saying, “This is my blood which is shed for the forgiveness of sins.”

 I have participated in this observance with churches in many nations, among believers of various languages.  Twice I have  shared the bread and the cup with fellow believers in the garden near the empty tomb where Jesus was buried. Last Sunday I observed the Lord’s Supper with over 100 believers in a new church, less than a month old, at the University of Northern Colorado  Once again I recalled His words, “Do this, as often as you do it, in remembrance of me,” (1 Corinthians 11:25).

Finding Happiness

Since 2012 the UN has released an annual World Happiness Report. The 2023 Report ranked the United States at number 15 with a score of 6.894 out of a possible 10. Finland ranked first with a score of 7.804.  Not surprisingly, Ukraine ranked 92^nd and Russia ranked 70^th. 

Perhaps the best-known quote in American history is Jefferson's three inalienable rights: “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.”  Not happiness, but the pursuit of happiness. Are we happy?  Are we pursuing the right things that can make us happy?

 

Following the pandemic, it appears that many are seeking happiness in crowds: football, basketball, baseball, hockey. Once empty stadiums are packed.  Concert venues are filled to overflowing.  We want to celebrate almost anything.  We want to celebrate together.

 

Commercials give us clues about our “pursuit” of happiness.  For many, happiness seems to be bound up with possessions: to own something better than somebody else whether houses, cars or clothes; our bodies: to be more beautiful, stronger, more attractive; sex: whether casual and illicit or friends with benefits; drugs (including alcohol):  whatever promises release from our inhibitions and escape from our problems; social media and technology: virtual reality, virtual friends and a virtual life.  With all their promises for happiness, these often lead to disappointment and, too often, disaster.

 

There is another way.  The Bible says, “Oh taste and see that the Lord is good.  How blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him. … Who is the man who desires life and loves length of days that He may see good?  Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking deceit.  Depart from evil and do good; desire peace and pursue it.” (Psalm 34:8-14)  “Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness. Delight in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. (Psalm 37:3).

 

No one is happy all the time. Jesus was characterized as “a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.”  But there is a joy that goes deeper than happiness; a joy that sustains us even in our difficulties.  “Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” (James 1:2-3).

 

Churches are often the happiest places on earth.  I have visited hundreds of them in most states and many countries.  Wherever I go, the gatherings of believers is characterized by joy, acceptance, encouragement, heartfelt hugs, laughter, smiles and love.  The people of God have within them this unquenchable joy that sustains them, even when times are tough.

 

This joy is the result of God’s redemption in Jesus Christ.  Our sins have been forgiven. Jesus has been raised from the dead.  As Isaiah predicted, “And the ransomed of the Lord will return and come with joyful shouting to Zion, with everlasting joy upon their heads.  They will find gladness and joy, and sorrow and sighing will flee away.”  (Isaiah 35:10).

Digital Faith

 I am a digital immigrant. I was born into a world of rotary dial telephones and slide rules, cash registers that resembled slot machines, schools without air conditioning, encyclopedias that occupied an entire shelf in the book case and paper maps that unfolded to fill the front seat of the car.  

 I started my immigration to the digital world about 40 years ago when I walked into Toys R Us with sweaty palms and bought my first computer, a Commodore 64.  It had 64k of memory and a floppy disk, used machine language and gave you time to get a cup of coffee while loading a program. You can still find Commodore 64s in a few attics, basements and museums.

 My oldest son is also a digital immigrant, though he was only eight years old when he started his digital journey.  After he grew up, he started his own computer support company and now manages an IT team for in an energy company in Wyoming.

 My grandchildren are digital natives.  They were born into the digital world and have never known anything else.  My younger grandchildren were playing computer games by the time they were four. At 12, 10 and 6 they each have their own iPad.    

 I like the digital world.  I would not want to go back.  I live with my iPhone and PC. I can browse the web and check email anywhere in the world.  I have conducted business and managed my bank accounts from Nuremburg and Tel Aviv. I felt a little sacrilegious when I started reading my Bible on my iPhone and my Kindle.  It seemed like it wasn’t really a Bible if I couldn’t flip the pages and smell the ink. I had to remind myself that the first Scriptures were handwritten on scrolls and that books came centuries later. 

 But there are dangers in the digital world that did not exist before.

 The world of virtual reality can undermine relationships in the real world robbing us of time, energy and emotional maturity.  More than one career has been destroyed by inappropriate posts on Facebook and Twitter. Pornography is at your fingertips.

 It is not unusual to see several people sitting at a table, each focused on their smart phone, none of them speaking to one another. Craig Detweiler writes in his book, iGods, “The iMac begat the IPhone and the iPad, and each one starts with me – or rather “i.” They enhance our ability to connect and to serve, but they can also create an inflated sense of self, believing the entire world revolves around “me.” … In an age of status updates, personalized shopping, and lists of followers, we are experiencing the rush of becoming iGods of our own making.”  All this sounds strangely like the first temptation, “When you eat of it you will be like God.” (Genesis 3:5).

 Our challenge is to incorporate the timeless and eternal truths that never change into our digital world with a digital faith that connects us with God and with one another.  The greatest commandment remains:  “Love God with all your heart, mind and strength and love your neighbor as yourself.”

Senior Citizen

 I am a “senior citizen.” I have been for some time.  How did this happen?  I never intended to become one. I spent my life busy about making a living, raising kids, pursuing career goals, trying to serve God and others and then, I woke up and I was a “senior citizen.”

 This was never my goal.  I never looked down the corridors of time and wished that someday I could become a senior citizen. It happened without my knowing.  I was assigned the title without my consent.

 The first indicator was a card in the mail from AARP.  I did not ask for this.  It just came, about the time I turned 50.  And then I received advertisements from the Neptune Society encouraging me to think about cremation. I don’t want to think about having my body burned, stuffed in a jar or  thrown to the wind.  I want to think about living.

 Part of it is my own fault.  I have sold out my pride for a few cents and asked for a “senior coffee,” a “senior menu,” or a “senior discount.”  Do I have no shame?

  Little things remind me I am aging.  When I purchase a plane ticket on the computer, I have to page down four times to find my birth year.  When I check out at Walmart, the cashier calls me “Sweetie.”  When I go to the barber the floor is littered with white hair clippings.

 We discipline ourselves in our youth so that we will live a longer life. But, when we live long, we discover that it leads to “old age.”  What is this?  I want my youth back.  I want to run and feel the exhilaration of running; to get out of bed without aching, to fly up the stairs two at a time, and to run down them without a thought and without a limp.  I want to eat whatever I want without gaining weight.

 But, if we are successful and live long lives, old age will come. Someone, somewhere said, “Growing old isn’t for sissies!”

 At age 79, Thomas Jefferson lamented about growing old to his friend John Adams, “It is at most but the life of a cabbage, ... when all our faculties have left, or are leaving us, one by one, sight, hearing, memory, ... friends of our youth are all gone, and a generation is risen around us whom we know not,” (Monticello, June 1, 1822). 

 And yet, we discover treasures that we did not expect.  Our children find their way and establish successful careers. Grandchildren giggle and squeal and leap into our arms.  Retirement brings freedom to live where we want, think what we want and do what we want. Friendships grow deep and nourish our souls like the roots of a tree.

 And, the experience of God’s love grows deeper: “You who have been borne by Me from birth and have been carried from the womb; even to your old age I will be the same, and even to your graying years I will bear you! I have done it, and I will carry you; and I will bear you and I will deliver you” (Isaiah 46:3-4)

Resurrection Faith

 I was 29 years old when my father died of multiple myeloma, cancer of the bone marrow.  He was 53.  Only hours before his death, I spoke with him.  Our eyes met during that final visit, the same eye contact we had shared from my birth, though his eyes were growing gray.  I held his hand as he drew his last breath, and then, he was gone.  His body lay lifeless and unresponsive.

 The morticians took his body from the hospital room where our family had waited through the night.  We visited the funeral home and chose a casket.  Shortly afterward other family and friends joined us to view his body lying still and quiet, dressed in his familiar suit, his hair combed.  I stood by the casket and stared at his face.  It was obvious another hand had combed his hair and another hand had tied his tie.  He seemed to be sleeping.

 I imagined him drawing breath. Imagined him opening his eyes so that they sparkled once again, his lips parting in the familiar grin, the dimples reappearing in his cheeks.  But he didn’t move. We buried his body in the cemetery surrounded by friends who came to comfort us. 

I asked myself the question Job asked centuries ago, the question every man and woman must ultimately ask when they stand where I stood on that day, “If a man die, shall he live again?”(Job 14:14).

 Job’s struggle with the question was not about theology or philosophy.  His struggle was like mine.  It was personal.  It is the struggle we all must face sooner or later when those whom we love die. 

 After having pondered the question, Job foresaw the Easter event we celebrate this weekend.  He wrote, “I know that my redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand on the earth. And after my skin has been destroyed, yet in my flesh I will see God; I myself will see him with my own eyes—I, and not another. How my heart yearns within me!” (Job 19:25-27).

 The world will ponder Job’s question this weekend when we gather in Christian churches around the world. When Jesus was raised from the dead, the answer to life’s most important question became clear.  Luke wrote, “After his suffering, he presented himself to them and gave many convincing proofs that he was alive. He appeared to them over a period of 40 days and spoke about the kingdom of God.” (Acts 1:3).  Paul wrote, “But now Christ has been raised from the dead, the first fruits of those who are asleep. For since by a man came death, by a man also came the resurrection of the dead.  For as in Adam all die, so also in Christ all will be made alive.” (1 Corinthians 15:20-22).

Bill's novel, We Beheld Hi Glory is FREE as an eBook on Amazon April 4-5.  Join the 12 in their journey with Jesus.